But wait! That's not how much it costs, it's how much Joseph Tomaino (aka Rod Stiffenpants) was supposed to be awarded when he sued The Male Sexual Dysfunction Institute for giving him that 72 hour stiffy.

FREEHOLD, N.J. - A man who had to endure a three-day erection after penile surgery was awarded $3 million by a jury two years ago...

[Sigh] I used to live in Freehold. Why is it that everywhere I lived there are kooks in the news? Terrorists in Lackawana (Buffalo), Berkley is freak central, Cubs in Chicago. It's like all of the places I leave are cursed. Anyway...

...but an appeals court ordered a Monmouth County judge to lower the award.

Sanity! Thank you, appeals court! But wait, there's more.

So Superior Court Judge Alexander Lehrer did — by one penny.

Hah, hah, hah. Good one, Lehrer! I bet the appeals court was quite amused.

In a decision written this week, the appeals panel reversed the judgment and sent the case back with orders for another judge to reduce the award, citing Lehrer's "demonstrated unwillingness to comply with our instructions."

Ever been bitch slapped by the appeals court before, Alex?

The appeals court had ordered Lehrer, who presided over the trial, to cut the $3 million, saying the size of the award "shocked the court's conscience"

Shocked the hell out of my concience too. The news story gets confusing at this point as it is intimated that the 3 day flagpole wasn't the problem - the guy is impotent for life. But, didn't he go to this place because he was impotent? As far as I can figure using this lowsy reporting job, Tomaino couldn't get it up so he went for help. They fixed him enough to give his girlfriend 3 days of heaven but then he couldn't get it up again. So he sues and gets $3 million?

I hope I'm seriously misreading this.